Sleezy Mizzy...

Sleezy Mizzy.....

I was afraid of them till I met her....

She was called from a distance by my love and she approached us with so much enthusiasm.

I was afraid as she started following us across the road, but as her gentle body brushed against my legs, the fear disappeared and my heart was filled with warmth and love...
A funny yet beautiful feeling.

The next night, I went back to find her. I called out from a distance, hoping that she would hear me and never it she failed to return my calls.

She has the most beautiful greenish eyes that I have ever seen... The short nights with her made me love her more and more.

There were times when my calls were not returned and for that moment I thought she had an owner. Had almost stop finding her but my mind could not forget her, and I was glad that I did not.

She had a kid. Black with her eyes. However, it was taken away from her. The sadness she had in her body language made my heart ached. Thank goodness she still had her "husband" around, father of her kid.

However, tonight she was alone. There was no sight of her husband. She had that same body language that I've saw before. She was calling and searching. The strangest thing was she followed me all the way to my door step, which was an unusual gesture. I tried to "excuse" myself, hoping she would return to her place but she kept me within her sight, even though she wandered away for a while.

I wanted to bring her home, but was chased by out by my father. He wanted to hit her, but I persuaded her to go down.

As the door closed, I heard her cries, but could not go to her rescue as I know she would have "suffered" more from my father, trying to scare her away.

Then I heard her cries again. My heart was torn.... It is a feeling I've never felt before.

If only I could do something for her..... I just hope she's fine....

Need an EXIT

Need an Exit...


I don't know what I've got myself into.
My heart is filled with misery.
I've been slapped time and time again and each time the pain is harder to bear.

It's getting too much to handle.
Each time I step into that room, the walls seem to be inching closer all on four sides, leaving me with no place to run.
I can't find joy anymore.

Everything I do is just not good enough.
It makes me wonder am I really such a fucking dumb ass who doesn't understand simple terms.
Each time I've get slapped, my mind turns blank; defeated, even though I knew what was going on.

If I get out, I'll be seen as an incompetent, pathetic shit who can't take "little" slaps.


How long do I still have to go through all these.
My heart fears going to that room now...

I need an exit...


I really do....