Mind game

Mind game

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Mind is getting exhausted.
It just wants to stop,
Stop and never function again
Enough is enough!
Rounding up every ounce of energy left
Yanks over the window ledge...

dis connected

dis connect ed

Eyes are droopy, a touch of the shut down button will caused it to close completely
Yet...
the mind forbids..

Thoughts wanna type happy words to allow their loved one, to feel every ounce of love expressed to them
Yet...
the heart forbids...

Tunes playing on the radio travel to the ears
Yet...
The words doesn't register; blurred
Noise.

Though just one heart, mind and soul
Deep within...
It is all just so...... DIS-Connect-ed...


for....

me,,,

human disaster

human disaster...

I seriously don't understand what is wrong with me.
Why can't I perform like normal people can?
Am I just plain dumb and slow or abnormal...

Sometimes people ask "so, what are you good at?"
I would be left dumbfounded.
Somehow I am just average.
Average in EVERYTHING (including how I look)

I don't know if this is just my shallow mind messing with me
Or I am really just.. like THAT.

People say practice makes perfect,
I don't think it applies to me.
The more I do, the worse I get.
I think if I were to carry on practicing, I might just lose that "skill".

Reading this, you might think : what the hell?! This is full of crap.
But I can't seem to find my moral now...
I think it had run away from me because I am way too hopeless for anything...

Well done.

Drunk

.DRUNK.

I was happy, enjoying myself with my girlfriends.
Soccer on screen, drinks on the table top.
Hennessy. Sprite.Coke.Green Tea. Weird mix.

Chats. Laughter. Jokes. Stories.
Hands reached out to the glass of drink infront of me.
Sipping from the mouth of the glass.
Feeling the liquid flowing down my throat.

Had the next glass, it followed on by the next.
I knew I had to go slow but temptation was coming to me.
I somehow wanted to know how a druken felt.
Foolish? Crazy? No, just curious...and stupid.

The world started spinning.
My mind was still sound but it got disconnected with my body movement.
It was a hell of a night.

The next morning I was sober again.
Got hell from my parents. Usual stuff. Thought I drank to drown my sorrows.
TYPICAL.
But I was proud of myself. I reached my goal.
I succeeded in getting drunk.

However deep down inside...

Did I get drunk for the feel of it?

Or was it really because of that TYPICAL reason....

personal conflict

Personality conflict
(inspired by Din)

A person's personality is like a crushed piece of paper.
There are too many sides to it.

Sometimes, when you think you're tough, you breakdown and cry.
Sometimes, when you put up a cool front, you suddenly laugh with the people around you.

You then try to search for your true self,
but it always ends up in a war that you're fighting with yourself.

I am a crushed piece of paper.

I am fighting my own war and till now, I still am...

sibling's love?

Siblings' love?

At times,
I HATE him when no appreciation is given for what I have done for him

At times,
I HATE him when he talks back to me, showing no respect

At times,
I HATE him when he thinks he is right when obviously he is at fault


But for these times when I HATEd him, I loved him as much...