Attention seeker

Attention seeker

Thought THIS feeling was temporary.
Thought it will go away after a night’s rest
Thought everything would be alright when I open my eyes to see that there was a reply; good or bad.
But, nothing.

Maybe I am seen as an independent girl
Someone who is strong enough to stand alone
Someone who is able to manage her emotions especially when she is falling

I want to be that strong
I do not want express THIS feeling out
But at times, when I am seen falling even though I put up a strong front
I just need someone to notice
A simple “how did your day went?”, a simple hug, or just a simple hand squeeze.
Just a tiny bit more attention
Is that too much to ask?

Maybe it is…
I’d wish I was stronger…

I am sorry to be so demanding.

the GREAT week

The Great Week


It’s been a great week. Finally gotten a chance to do what I’ve wanted to do all my life, well, at least half my life.

Went into this, knew there will definitely be competition but held a lot of hopes though.

Funny thing I realized, some people just have the talent for everything without even trying hard. “Gifted” that’s how I would put it.

Honestly, knew all along life was always unfair, but I held on to the hope of it being fair one day. I know it’s a sin to say this, I know GOD is fair, HE is, but what is my “gift”?

Seems to me that my all dreams are impossible to come true. Maybe I dream big? Maybe I’m just not cut up for anything.

“Jack of all trades, Master of none”. When I’m being told that, I used to say : “ well, at least I know many things” but now, I seem to be proving the other part of the phrase right more than the first.

People would tell me : “Work hard!!! Sometimes it’s luck and timing! You’ll get there!” Crap.

One thing’s for sure, this dream I had for half of my life, has been shattered within the great week.