the POWER of SINGLISH...

When going shopping...

Britons : I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater youwant in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.

S'poreans: No Stock!

When returning a call...

Britons : Hello, this is Mr Bean. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?

S'poreans: Hello, who page?

When someone is in the way...

Britons : Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?

S'poreans: Siam lai! or Siam, hor! or Skius!

When someone offers to pay...

Britons : Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.

S'poreans: no need lah.

When asking for permission...

Britons : Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?

S'poreans: (while pointing at door) Can pass or Not?

When asking to be excused...

Britons : If you would excuse me for a moment, I have to go to the gents/ladies. Please carry on without me, it would only take a moment.

S'poreans: Go toilet. Buay tahan ahh.....

When entertaining...

Britons : Please make yourself right at home.

S'poreans: ! Don't shy shy lah..

When doubting someone...

Britons : I don't recall you giving me the money.

S'poreans: Got meh?

When deciding on a plan of action...

Britons : What do you propose we do now that the movie's sold out & all the restaurants are closed?

S'poreans: So how?

When disagreeing on a topic of discussion...

Britons : Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand whereyou're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you saidabout the policy.

S'poreans: Talk cock lah you!

When asking someone to lower their voice...

Britons : Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.

S'poreans: Eh, tiam leh!

When asking someone if he/she knows you...

Britons : Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time. DoI know you?

S'poreans: See what see?